Everybody is so preoccupied with a million and twelve things at once that it can be easy to ignore the one thing we should be listening to most — our bodies.
Of course we notice the big things, but what about the size of your nose? Your sweat? Yeah, there are a lot of things your body is trying to tell you about…if you listen. Like your finger nails. They tell an awful lot about your overall health, but more on that later.
First of all, what happens to your body when you drink alcohol? After just one minute of drinking, the alcohol gets absorbed into your bloodstream.
After five minutes, it reaches your brain and you might be a little more apt to dance on the table. Your muscles will be affected, which means your coordination will suffer, which means you will not be a Dancing Queen for long. After thirty minutes, you’ll be completely relaxed.
Forty-five minutes later, the liver is working overtime to process the alcohol and well, look at that dude. Then, an hour later, the kidneys send everything to your bladder, so best find yourself a restroom.
An hour into your drinking, your body is already dehydrated. This is the main reason for those nasty hangovers the next day, and why they recommend a glass of water in between your glass of whatever else got you that way.
Let’s move on to odors…
First of all, there’s sweat.
If it smells like acetone, you might be having blood sugar level problems. If it smells like ammonia, it could mean kidney and liver problems. If your sweat smells like hydrogen sulphide, you could have gastrointestinal problems.
If it smells like honey, it could mean a case of cystitis. If it smells like vinegar, if could mean a vitamin B and D deficiency. I don’t think I’ve ever really smelled my own sweat, so that’s a weird new thing to try.
Next, we’re exploring your breath, so pop yourself a mint. Non-stop bad breath could be a sign of kidney problems, throat infections, lung problems, gum disease, or even problems with your digestive tract. In other words, nobody wins.
When it comes to urine, things start to get more serious. If it smells like fish, it could mean a venereal disease. If it smells sour, it could mean gastritis. Get thee to a doctor!
But first, examine your nose.
Let’s start with the Greek nose.
If you have it, chances are you don’t like attention, you’re family-oriented and practical.
A Roman nose says that you’re an unusual thinker.
You like to take risks both personal and professional. You also have very strong principles, morals and politics that you strongly believe in.
If you have an aquiline nose, you’re probably very neat.
You don’t believe in things being too difficult so you’re always up for a challenge. You’re also very sincere.
If you have a straight nose, you’re a bit of a right-brained thinker.
You believe in following your gut and acting based on how you feel. You act on your feelings first, then you think about your decisions.
An upturned nose reveals that you’re pretty sassy.
You can be searingly honest, unpredictable and hilarious. You always find the solutions to your problems.
A nose with a small bump.
People with this type of nose can be considered “flower children.” They’re sensitive, they stand up against injustice and they’re generous towards those who need it.
A nose with a large bump.
If you have this nose, you’re very attentive. You’re known for being a good listener, and a good friend overall. You’re also one of the best coolest people in the world, as determined by a writer here with a large bump on her nose.
A nubian nose is a sign that you know how to get out of tricky situations.
You’re always the first one to help others when they need it. You’re also very positive and optimistic. Now that we’re done with the nose, let’s move on to the rest of the body.
Your body comes equipped with defense mechanisms, like stretching. A good stretch prepares your body for any physical activity ahead of you — or a really comfortable Netflix binge, but let’s go with physical activity.
Yawning is another defense mechanism. Scientists are still not sure why humans and animals alike yawn, but the closest theory is that it can help regulate our temperature.
Wrinkled fingers are another mystery with one plausible explanation. Scientists believe that we evolved to have pruned fingers when they get wet in order to have a better grip on wet things. Hear that, raisin hands?
Along with being a great way to get attention, sneezing gets rid of unwanted intruders that made their way into our nose. A study by researched at the University of Pennsylvania also found that sneezes “reset” the environment in our nasal passage. Gesundheit.
Another surprising defense mechanism: goosebumps. The hair on our bodies stands up when we’re cold in order to create an extra layer of warmth.
What about those memory wipes or lost time? In psychology, there’s a theory that humans can sometimes get rid of painful or traumatic memories in order to avoid the anxiety and depression that comes with them.
In psychology, there’s a theory that humans can sometimes get rid of painful or traumatic memories in order to avoid the anxiety and depression that comes with them.
Hiccups are another defense mechanism, probably because you annoy everyone around you. When something irritates your diaphragm, like when you eat too quickly or get nervous, hiccups occur in order to regulate what goes into your stomach.
There’s a reason you cringe at high-pitched noises. Research has shown that the reason why we cringe when we hear nails on chalkboard is because of a primal instinct that reminds us of the cries of our primate ancestors.
Certain spots on your body can say a lot about your health. Dark or red spots on your backside can mean that your hygiene is poor or your underwear is made of irritating fabric. Nothing wrong with cotton, my friends. It breathes.
If you’re prone to acne and spotting on your chin and neck, this could mean that your adrenal glands are overactive. Spotting on your shoulders, upper and lower back can mean a number of things. Most commonly, this could be a sign that there’s something going on with your digestion. Everything okay down there?
The shape of your feet can say a lot about your personality. Type A means you’re private and change moods quickly. Type B means you’re practical and reliable. Type C means you’re sporty and creative. Type D means you’re sociable and outgoing.
Finger nails
Finger nails tell us loads of information about our health. Did you know your nails can reveal clues to your overall health? A touch of white here, a rosy tinge there, or some rippling or bumps may be a sign of disease in the body. Problems in the liver, lungs, and heart can show up in your nails.
For example, very pale nails can be a sign of anemia, congestive heart failure, liver disease, or malnutrition.
If the nails are mostly white with darker rims, this can indicate liver problems, such as hepatitis. In this image, you can see the fingers are also jaundiced, another sign of liver trouble.
One of the most common causes of yellow nails is a fungal infection. As the infection worsens, the nail bed may retract, and nails may thicken and crumble. In rare cases, yellow nails can indicate a more serious condition such as severe thyroid disease, lung disease, diabetes or psoriasis.
If the nail surface is rippled or pitted, this may be an early sign of psoriasis or inflammatory arthritis. Discoloration of the nail is common; the skin under the nail can seem reddish-brown.
Dry, brittle nails that frequently crack or split have been linked to thyroid disease. Cracking or splitting combined with a yellowish hue is more likely due to a fungal infection.
H/T Twenty Two Words
Sassy Liberty 
Max Tucker